"We're sorry to announce we reduced the price for this item 3 times already, but unfortunately due to it being very damaged and used... We decided to give it away for free.
It's been causing havoc in our warehouse, indecently exposing itself to our workers and distracting them from their duties with various oral activities and occasionally even coitus took place.
For reasons listed above this item requires an experienced Owner with a strong grip, twisted mind and ideally a dungeon where the item could be kept under control and put to good use."